By definition, grace is 1. A favor rendered by one who need not do so; 2. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people; 3. The state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God; 4. To honor or favor; 4. To give beauty, elegance, or charm to; 5. God's forgiving mercy. So if I were to say to you God wants to bestow His grace upon you, how would that make you feel?

This past week was very intense between God and I. We had many long, sometimes wearing discussions, but it all came down to this one concept. Grace. For the most part, I didn't want to accept the grace God was offering me freely. Not out of pride, but because I didn't think I was ready to. I tend to be quite the perfectionist when it comes to important decisions and I don't want to make the wrong one, ever. I know I can't ever be perfect, but there is a battle that rages within me when it comes to making the right decisions. I want to know if I'm going to fail, and if I am I won't make the decision that way. That was key that God was trying to show me. That's why He wants me to accept His grace because when I do, I'll know that even when I do make a mistake, it's not the end of the world, and I won't be paralyzed by the fear of 'will I screw up?'

Through 3 different people, at 3 different times this weekend, God spoke a certain scripture to them to give to me. The funny part is, I came across the same scripture earlier in the week, and put it aside because I wasn't so sure I really wanted it to speak to me. By the third person this weekend, I got the hint. 2 Corinthians 12:7- 10 says:  

⁷To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. ⁸Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. ⁹But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. ¹⁰That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

So this week I've devoted to just waiting upon the Lord. Just listening. Not really making requests but just seeing what God really wants to just speak to my heart. Instead of questioning and getting angry, I'm going to just let Him speak and see where things go. And the most important thing, remember.. IT'S A PROCESS!!!